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More college business

May 3rd, 2017 at 09:31 am

Kid finally called yesterday to see what impact his mom getting married would have on his scholarship (see last entry.) He was given a new website with a calculator that would help determine whether he was still eligible. He asked his mom for the finance's salary info (through text, since he was at our house) and she got upset and told him that only her salary counted.

He's going to sit down with her and asked her again for all the information. N coached him a bit-he wants to make sure kid stays calm throughout it all and is respectful to his mom, but also wants him to know when it's okay to be upset. So N asked "what if she said there's no way to know what they make?" and kid said "I will say 'Didn't you just do your taxes?' " I have a feeling this conversation is not going to go well tonight.

N is already preparing what he is going to say in a meeting with kid's mom. Unfortunately, I don't think she will really "hear" what he has to say. She can still have the big wedding, the party, the dress, the ring, the vows and the committment she wants. It would just be better for kid, and for her relationship with kid, if she didn't sign the marriage papers until after he graduated college.

Kid was pretty down yesterday and I wished that there was something I could do to even temporarily make him happy. He is such a good kid and this is such a stressful time.

If it looks like he won't get his full ride to a Big 10 that he's been promised, we worry about what his senior year will look like. I think he might live with us full time (he is definitely welcome to, but we've always stressed not to hurt his mom-I think this is an exception.) I worry he will just do the bare minimum to graduate.

I've looked into what community college costs around here. If worst case scenario happens I think I will offer to pay for his first 2 years (or until he transfers to university.) BUT there will be a contract and things he has to uphold (renewable each semester so if he thinks it's too much then he can opt out.) 1. He has to maintain a 3.0 average. If he isn't going to actually try then he can pay for college himself. That's all I got right now.

We'll see. He has a lot of people in his life and he isn't my kid-frankly his mom should be the one figuring this out. This whole situation just makes me sick.

I'm still plugging away at my finances. The basement reno for the Airbnb space is finally paid off!!! Woo hoo!

3 Responses to “More college business”

  1. creditcardfree Says:

    So glad he has you and his Dad to lean on for support. It may be hard for him to see right now, but he will.

  2. rob62521 Says:

    You are right, his mom should be helping him figure this out. But as you can tell, she doesn't have that interest. What a blessing you are in his life to help him.

  3. Carol Says:

    Happy you are being there for him. Great news about the payoff.

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