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Change is hard

March 9th, 2016 at 08:22 am

I wrote a pretty long post yesterday that got lost in the internet..I hope things are working better today.

So, I have the opportunity to take a temporary, remote position of grading the written portion of our state's standardized tests. It starts April 7 and goes for about 5 weeks, until all the tests are graded. It requires at least 30 hours a week and can go up to 40. I had planned on my last day at the public library being April 30, but if I take this opportunity it would be April 16. So that leaves one week of working 90 hours (I would take some time off from the other two jobs to get the hours in).

But...here's the thing. I am very anxious about leaving the public library. I have been there 6.5 years. I like my job. The actual job part of it, not everything else. I am worried about losing the extra pay. I am worried about closing a door...even temporarily. I know I am not doing myself any favors staying there because I will never be considered for higher than my current position, but I am still scared. I thought I had made peace with my decision but now that it's coming up that I have to act on it, I am nervous.

I don't have to accept this grading position, but it seems interesting to me, pays 12.10/hour and I can do it at home. It gives me a couple extra weeks of a second paycheck. I don't necessarily *need* the extra paycheck. I have been trying to limit my expenses and stick to my guns. But it would be helpful.

I have been trying to figure out the direction I want to go in terms of my career but I still haven't focused in on just one. On one hand that gives me options, but on the other it just feels like I am spinning my wheels because I am not seeing progress towards any one thing.

4 Responses to “Change is hard”

  1. LivingAlmostLarge Says:

    Sounds interesting. What do you fulltime?

  2. jokeabee Says:

    LAL- I work at the library at the university in town. It is a good job, and I am fairly compensated, but I am running into the same problem as the public library-they want my MLS, but don't want to pay me for it. I am hoping to use this as a stepping stone from a paraprofessional position into a librarian position. And to take advantage of the tuition benefit I get- 1 free class a semester.

  3. snafu Says:

    Jokeabee, have you considered talking to a headhunter or an HR specialist to outline realistic possibilities that align your interests, credentials and compensation you can reasonable expect? Is working 90 hrs reasonable? How do you make that work? It's nerve racking working 60 hrs from time to time and carry on with meals, laundry, transportation and some sleep.

  4. PatientSaver Says:

    i wouldn't feel bad about leaving your current job; they should understand you have your own concerns to worry about. It happens all the time. especially if you give them notice.

    BTW, i always routinely type my posts and then before publishing, i copy and paste onto a word doc so that if i lose the post, I still have it. i'm surprised they haven't fixed that glitch yet since they fixed the photo thing.

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